When Being Brave Means Disappointing Others

“Do not think that you can be brave with your life and your work and never disappoint anyone. It doesn’t work that way.”- Oprah Winfrey

I am not typically an Oprah Winfrey fan, but I fully believe that you can learn from others, even if you don’t necessarily agree with everything they believe in.

This quote from Oprah Winfrey, which she shared when interviewed by Brene Brown awhile back, really struck a cord with me.

I wouldn’t say that I am necessarily a people pleaser.  I tend to march to the beat of my own drum and am fairly confident in the things that I want to pursue.  I am a classic INFJ (even my husband was shocked at how well this description pegged me) and when my gut feels strongly in a direction, I do not hesitate to walk towards it, even though odds may be against me.

I am a dreamer. Details tend to bore and overwhelm me, but that doesn’t mean I don’t find them important. They just aren’t my strengths. I don’t seek advice a lot, unless I really, really need direction and wise counsel in an area.  I want the best information possible if I have to make a big decision and I find myself stuck.

I am not a people pleaser, but at the same time, I really don’t enjoy disappointing people. I never want to make someone upset about my actions or decisions, even if they are the best for ME and MY Family.

But the reality is, I will disappoint people.  And so will you.

I have to imagine that when David decided to take on Goliath, even after well meaning people told him not to because he was young, not a soldier, and inexperienced, that it took some bravery. (Read 1 Samuel 17 for more insight onto this…plus, the story of David and Goliath is always a good one.  So many great lessons we can glean from this!)

His own brother was angry with David and mistook David’s willingness to go up against the giant as selfish and as a means to gain popularity and ranking, instead of seeing that David loved His Lord and wanted to serve and defend Him and state the truth of who God was and about Israel. David had faith that God was leading this incredible moment. Just a note, you will have family members who will mistake your bravery and direction with motives you didn’t intend.  Do not be afraid, but understand that it will happen.

365 times do the words “Do Not Fear” appear in the bible.  God says that to His followers many times, as a way to encourage them as they navigate the often treacherous and uncertain waters of their lives, or they find themselves in situations they are unsure about.

God did not give us a spirit of fear, but of power, and love, and of self-control. 2 Timothy 1:7

Lately, due to the many changes going on currently in our life, I have found myself embracing new opportunities and asking new questions about my life, my dreams and what I want to pursue.  I am not necessarily leaving behind current obligations, but being open and praying about how I can best utilize my gifts, talents, dreams and abilities to serve God and serve His people.

I have been writing more, which while does not bring me a paycheck, it has allowed me express my heart and share what God has been teaching me.  If I could never work again in my life, writing and blogging is what I would want to do.

I have also been taking advantage of my love of fashion and shopping and selling clothes on a fun little app called Poshmark.  This is another way to help bring in additional income for my family, and try out something new.  Many people will view it as a waste of time, but I am not really concerned with that.  It is fun for me and I have found myself enjoying the process of finding cute items to list, sell, then wrap beautifully and ship to a customer.  I enjoyed working in retail as a teenager, and I don’t think I would mind working in a retail store or boutique.

I am still working as an online health and fitness coach through Be a Size You.  I have really stopped focusing on challenge groups and have found that most of those who follow me are needing more individual attention and guidance and encouragement.  They are willing to buy a plan, but they aren’t comfortable yet with sharing with an entire group of women they don’t really know (and truthfully, it is hard to really know someone online.)  This allows me to build  a better relationship with the woman I am serving, and really help her be the hero in her own health and fitness story.  This decision goes against the grain of “do more challenge groups” and “sell a bunch of fitness plans and shakes.”  I love our fitness programs and I love our nutritional products, and those who do my 1:1 sessions do need to invest in one or both of those in order to get started, but we will journey through it together and they will have my full attention.

Are you about to embark on something new, and are afraid of disappointing others?  Be brave, sister friend. You are bound to.  But when others express disappointment in you because you are choosing to go down a different career path, goal, adventure, whatever……understand that most of the time, they just can’t understand what you are doing because they aren’t willing to do it themselves.  You aren’t doing it for them.

My WHY is always my family.  Every business decision, every relational decision, every heart decision….my family is the biggest motivator for them.  My dream is to serve them and take care of them. To create something wonderful that I could possibly pass on to them.  To live a life of faith and trusting in God’s goodness and mercy and grace and teaching my children to embrace all that the Lord has for us and for them and for their future.  Others will not understand it or your bravery, but it will be okay.

Be a Size You,

Tiffany

 

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